Dame Edna, MP

Back in April, I contacted my member of the provincial legislature via e-mail to voice my opposition to the government’s plans regarding what I consider to be the giveaway of public rivers for the purpose of private power generation. I received in return a standard form letter telling me how important my views are to the government, and other BS crafted by the Liberal spin office. No big deal – that’s exactly the response I expected.

However, since then, I have discovered that by writing to a representative of the provincial government I am now being spammed by the MLA in question, Lorne Mayencourt, who subsequently resigned as provincial sycophant to Gordon Campbell and is now the Conservative Party of Canada candidate in the federal election campaign.

The first e-mail invited me to attend the announcement of Mayencourt’s candidacy for the Conservative nomination. The most recent message invited me to a Conservative Party rally with Stephen Harper at the Bayshore.

I’ll overlook for the moment the obvious idiocy of a homosexual choosing to join a band of religious zealots who, it’s widely believed, would rather ship him off to a penal colony than shower with him in the Commons gym. My friend Colin, not one to mince words, would equate such misplaced loyalty to a fictional ‘Jews for Hitler’, a rather tasteless phrase but one that nonetheless conveys the idea pretty clearly.

Normally I would frown upon attacking someone’s personal appearance in a political campaign, but since old Lorne has decided to start spamming me, and since he has presumably betrayed my confidentiality by passing along my private e-mail address to the Conservative Party, I figure all’s fair now. Thus, I present you with an image from Lorne’s own web page:

I’m not sure how Lorne expects to attract votes with an image like this. First of all, he’s posing with a man who, when I look closely at his eyes, I can’t help but think of the bastard child of Jerry Falwell and Karla Homolka.

Secondly, what’s with that hair? Is that a perm? And those glasses! A rather poor combination that makes him look more like the fifth runner-up in a Dame Edna lookalike contest than a serious candidate for federal office. How is Lorne going to be taken seriously as the Minister of Social Cleansing looking like that? He’ll never get out of the backbench, if he’s elected, relegated to standing up to support every bit of regressive legislation Stephen Harper’s masters thrust into his hand in the hopes of being looked kindly upon by the men with power and decent toupees.

Oh well. To each his fashion.

For the convenience of my readers, here are the other, more worthy, candidates running in Vancouver Centre:

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